Stepping into 26
I've jumped into year 26 of my life and I feel like I'm finally filling in my own shoes. I'm trying to dance to the beat of my own drum and slide away from any bullshit (of others and my own) that's going to prevent me from living my life how I want to experience it. While I value the opinions and company of those I respect and admire, I'm caring less about what the remaining random assortment of people in my life will think when it concerns how I'm stepping through life. It's time I trust my gut and feel confident in my choices. If it's a mistake, I'll call it a lesson.
Per usual, a lot has been in motion, but at least it's all forward motion. From checking off daily to-do lists, reassessing friendships, moving my boyfriend into my apartment (big news alert!), and developing a better sense of self, I feel good today. I don't always feel good. I still stress more than I'd like and get frustrated about dealing with the stressors, but I'm working on it. I realize I don't have to work through things alone. I can still wave my independent woman flag while asking for help. The moment I started letting more people in to support me, whether through actual action or just emotional support, I felt more free and capable.
Self-care isn't a trend. It's a necessity that we should refuse to overlook. If that means waking up an hour earlier to fit in some personal time, then so be it. Something as small as getting an extra 60 minutes of "me time" a day as been a super positive lifestyle change for me. Also, one quick note about self-worth. We have to recognize and celebrate how awesome it is to be who we have become through all trials and tribulations, and get excited about how we have the power to create the space to continue learning and growing from within. I've been on the struggle bus with prioritizing these "self concepts" for quite some time, but if I have an issue with something or I'm not taking care of myself, I try to pin point the root of the problem and figure out how to be pro-active in bettering the situation. The process isn't always quick and easy, but even baby steps is progress and I see that as success.
I was listening to Henry Green's cover of "Electric Feel" while writing this post at Matcha Bar in Silverlake xx